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Wednesday, August 27, 2014

Dear Internet:

Here's what bugs me on the internet right now:


If Mars were close enough to appear as big as the Moon, we'd all be dead.


Also, Mars doesn't have two suns. That's stupid.


"Chinese Feng Shui" is about arrangement of objects. It has nothing to do with the Western Calendar, and even less to do with sharing on Facebook. Also, any time a 31 day month starts on a Friday, there are five full weekends. Not every 823 years.


Facebook does not have a police force. Not even a "Drug Task Force". They'd lose too many subscribers if they did that.


That page that really wants to give you a free iPhone[newest version] is a scam.


Money is not donated for sharing pictures of fragile, vulnerable children like trading cards. Those pictures are used without the parents' permission, every single goddamned time, and the only thing it does is bring up the worst moment of a parent's life. Don't share it "just in case", or you're part of the problem.


If you only accept information from people who claim they vote the same as you, then you are easily led.

 

Sharing something online doesn't keep ghosts away. It doesn't affect your luck. God probably doesn't give a shit if you share something or not, either.

 

Mermaids have not been found by anyone, anywhere, ever.

 

"Ignore if u dont care" posts can't tell you if you care or not. They obviously don't care enough to use real words.

 

If a video contains "100% proof" in the title, it's just a ploy to keep you from thinking about it, even a little bit.

 

I don't have a girlfriend. 



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